You Are The Writer!

I don't spend a great deal of time over at the DC Comics message boards - I'll drop by if I'm shamelessly advertising one of the Annotations sites I've done but mostly when I do visit, I'm happy to just read the posts. I'm a lurker more than a contributor there if I'm honest.

Whenever I do call over there, though, there's one thing that always baffles me: the fan-fic threads. Pop along to just about any board and you'll see a thread where someone has started a story about that hero or team whether it's Booster Gold:

the Doom Patrol:

or even Zatanna:

Who'd Like A Cocktail? #109

You're not alone, Ray; I miss them too.

Who'd Like A Cocktail? #105

See, there are worse things than pelicans

• THE BOYS #48 - with one of the best pastiche covers ever, the new Boys storyline gets underway. The Homelander's plans seem to be underway and Butcher's previous bastardry comes back to haunt him.
• BRIGHTEST DAY #13 - a Hawkman-heavy issue is never a bad thing even when all he's doing is beating the crap out of things which, let's face it, is what he does best. A quick cameo by the Resurrection Man reminds us that Deadman still has a mission to find the Chosen One and as a certain Batman has recently returned, there's no prizes for guessing who next issue will feature.
• CROSSED: FAMILY VALUES #5 - for a moment at the start of this issue there was a flash of what the Crossed world offers to writers: an exploration of how normal people deal with the extreme crap they find themselves in. Then they had to go and bring the corseted and stockinged mother into things as a cartoon villain out to get them. Ah well, not long to go now.
• DOOM PATROL #16 - would it be remiss of me to mention that I've met Brian Keene, author of this issue? And that he's a good friend of my mate Tim? Probably, so I won't. Even though it's something of a fill-in, this is still a good fun issue with some wonderful Giffen artwork. It manages to further Robotman's character as well, pushing him towards the horrible realisation that he may be turning into the Chief. Talking of Robotman, just about any other issue would have ended with that wonderful splash page of the alternate reality Cliff roaring in and I'd have been happy with that. Carrying on with an excellent next panel was just laugh out loud funny! A damn fine issue.
• FREEDOM FIGHTERS #3 - Phantom Lady turns out to be the ace in the hole to get rid of the renegade shamans before Firebrand's conspiracy theories take over. And hey, Miss America's back! Another cool issue of paranoid politics and superheroics.
• JSA ALL-STARS #12 - despite the cover depicting a big space battle, the vast majority of this issue deals with Cyclone and her attempts at leading a normal, de-powered life in university. Until not one but two apparent clones of her super-powered self turn up . . . or do they? Neither Roxy nor one of Cyclone's university friends seem to notice the doubles . . .
• LADY MECHANIKA #0 - finally managed to get my hands on this even though it's been out for a couple of weeks. The art's gorgeous and the steampunk genre is one I enjoy so I'll be sticking with this. The only slight quibble is Benitez's dialogue. Mostly it's okay but every now and then it's just a bit clunky and forced. But hey, it's an introductory issue so here's hoping it'll improve.
• SECRET SIX #27 - both teams go berserk in Skataris and Catman makes a passable Warlord. It's all a bit hectic, to be honest, and I'll be glad once they're back in the real world again.

And what made me smile:

Recipes at the back of Lady Mechanika! This is what we want!

Who'd Like A Cocktail? #102

Larfleeze shows why he's the one getting his own Christmas special this year

• BOOSTER GOLD #37 - you're almost left with the thought that either Giffen or DeMatteis is occasionally tapping the other one on the shoulder and saying "Didn't we have a plot we were following at some point?" This is still a great fun series but it does delight in wandering down various sub-plot alleyways before being wrenched back to the main one! And methinks we haven't seen the last of Estrogina!
• GREEN LANTERN #58 - finally, Carol Ferris slaps down Hal Jordan's expectations, reminding him of his girl back home while she gets on with her life. Meanwhile Salaak begins to get suspicious of Jordan's activities and hey, the Flash turns up.
• GREEN LANTERN: EMERALD WARRIORS #3 - the Red Lantern Bleez seems to be along for the ride, but at least she can speak now. Sodam Yat finds he's being hunted by his own father and that creepy, floating dwarf who's behind the draining of Lantern's rings shows up again.
• JUSTICE LEAGUE: GENERATION LOST #11 - this issue's pretty much all about the Metal Men attacking Fire, Ice and Rocket Red which ends up with Ice being forced into her new persona, the origin of which we meet in the next issue and which I moaned about earlier this week.
• JUSTICE SOCIETY OF AMERICA 80 PAGE GIANT 2010 - I've said it before: the thing with anthologies is you have to take the rough with the smooth. The Obsidian story was well done though it was little more than an origin tale; Jesse Quick helps a battered woman (as an aside - a trash can lid can deflect bullets? I don't think so!); Mr Terrific's tale was a little empty; Cyclone battles through some some spiteful people and discovers a new power; Sand shoots a cop (but he deserved it); the Wildcats get closer to each other; and Dr Fate manages to help someone in death. Mostly okay stories, though the Mr Terrific one was, as I said, just a little less than the others.
• KNIGHT AND SQUIRE #1 - I've never picked up a book before on the strength of a preview, but had to give this a go. It's wonderfully British and I applaud DC for publishing it. Storywise it does little except establish some characters but does so with humour and charm. Well worth getting.
• UNTOLD TALES OF BLACKEST NIGHT #1 - basically an anthology so again a little hit and miss. I think the most pertinent thing to come out of it was the recruitment of Lyssa Drak by the floating, creepy dwarf from the Green Lantern titles.

And what made me smile:

Induce vomiting! Kiss her!

Who'd Like A Cocktail? #101

You won't find Anna Fortune getting teary eyed with nostalgia

• THE BOYS #47 - aw, crap . . . Wee Hughie loses it with Starlight in a scene that had me cringing. You know you're emotionally invested in fictional characters when you just want to grab them and say "Stop f*****g things up!"
• BRIGHTEST DAY #11 - Firestorm throws down against his evil counterpart while Aquaman and Black Manta have a huge fight. Oh, and the Black Lantern version of the twelve resurrected characters reappear. Strangely, the best part of the issue for me was that last two page spread of a huge forest covering the surface of Mars.
• DOOM PATROL #15 - the Chief goes completely off the rails as the Kryptonian powers he's absorbed send him more than a little crazy. The fight between the Doom Patrol and the Chief is touching and sad though I somehow doubt that this is the end of Caulder. And who'd have thought a pelican could look so startled?
• FREEDOM FIGHTERS #2 - another solid issue as Uncle Sam and the Freedom Fighters go up against the renegade shamans from the past . . . and get their butts kicked. A little standard, plot wise - issue 1 introduces the threat, issue 2 the threat beats the heroes, issue 3 the heroes try but fail to beat them before realising/finding a key idea/item, issue 4 the heroes beat the threat - but no less enjoyable because of Palmiotti and Gray's cracking dialogue and the lovely art by Travis Moore. Once passed this story which is establishing the team for new readers, I've no doubt this series will really kick into gear.
• JSA-ALL STARS #11 - did Atom Smasher miss the meeting about giant-sized fights in the middle of a city? Can't help thinking that's not his brightest move. Elsewhere, Cyclone's back, Power Girl recuperates (how else is a solar powered hero going to recharge other than by sun-bathing!) and Atom Smasher and Anna Fortune start some serious flirting.
• Co feature LIBERTY BELLE AND HOURMAN - so this story that's been drawn out a little too long comes to an end. As I've said before, it's good - the characters are well written and the art's great - but it's just felt a bit stretched. But hey, a nice resolution.
• SECRET SIX #26 - if ever there was a place where Bane fitted in, it looks like it's Skataris. The two teams go head to head a lot sooner than I'd expected and that last page . . . not sure where that's going to go next issue.

And what made me smile:

Oh, Ambush Bug, you are a one.

Who'd Like A Cocktail? #97

Phantom Lady shows name-calling is a part of fighting villains

• THE BOYS #46 - Butcher shows his sensitive side . . . right before he shows he's still something of a bastard after all as he allows Wee Hughie to discover just what Starlight did to get accepted into the Seven. It's masterfully done by Ennis and throughout the entire issue you can't help but think Butcher's not such a bad sort after all. At least right up till that last page.
• BRIGHTEST DAY #9 - So the new Aqualad's Black Manta's son? Blimey. And Martian Manhunter's having a bit of a hard time as well. This series keeps romping along nicely.
• FREEDOM FIGHTERS #1 - I was really happy when this series was announced, having enjoy Palmiotti & Gray's earlier Uncle Sam and The Freedom Fighters series and this was no disappointment. Always nice to see Nazis taking a kicking and some nicely done introduction scenes for the main players before leaving the issue on a cliff hanger.
• JSA ALL-STARS #10 - In between the All-Stars kicking some divine butt down in Parador, King Chimera and Cyclone's tentative romance moves on apace, at least until her supersonic sneeze! Power Girl steals this issue, though, by effectively beating the crap out of the gods - until her own self-confidence lends them a hand in beating her.
• Co feature LIBERTY BELLE & HOURMAN - once again an enjoyable few pages but, really, the plots been a little thin since the start so while each episode has been fun, it hasn't really gelled for me.
• SECRET SIX #25 - despite feeling like I missed an issue somewhere along the line (last month's foray into the Wild West anyone?)  this is still one of the best titles out there. Looks like we're going to have two teams face off against each other in some weird alien / dinosaur dimension. Best thing, though, is the possibility that Gail Simone will get some payback for the death of the Atom by having Giganta stomp all over Dwarfstar.

And what made me smile:

New sword please!

Who'd Like A Cocktail? #93

Negative Man speaks the truth in Doom Patrol #13

Life gets in the way sometimes, hence nothing much happening here over the last few days, but hey, look: comics!

• BLACK TERROR #11 - I think Phil Hester's settled in to the writer's role now; Black Terror's dialogue is fun to read and, for most of this issue, he's simply not interested in navel gazing. Fighting a duplicate of himself that's meant to shake him to his core? He doesn't care, he's just having fun beating the crap out of it! On the whole, this is pretty good stuff, though there was one thing that made me laugh but that's at the bottom of this list . . .
• THE BOYS #45 - that lovely, innocent looking cover belies at least one cat getting out of the bag in this issue: Starlight coming out as a supe to Wee Hughie. It's a sad tale that leaves the poor lad in a hell of a state, particularly when Butcher makes an apparently honest attempt to reach out to him.
• BRIGHTEST DAY #7 - so the White Lantern finally explains to everyone it brought back why it did so. And, of course, the answers are about as enigmatic as you'd expect. Anyone thinking we were going to get straightforward reasons must be disappointed! Still, nice to see Miss Martian looking better than she did at the end of last issue.
• CROSSED: FAMILY VALUES #3 - as brutal as this issue is, it wasn't the subject matter that left me feeling a little uneasy, rather it was the art. For some reason, this issue's artwork seemed more cartoon-like than any previous, more amateurish almost. Some of it felt just a little too gratuitous, really, a feeling that Jacen Burrows's work on the original series never induced. I hate to sound so negative (I do try to be fairly upbeat about comics on this blog) but the art just let this issue down.
• DOOM PATROL #13 - whereas this issue that focused on Elasti-Girl was, quite possibly, the best of the run so far. An origin tale of sorts, Rita reveals her big secret to the rest of the Patrol and looks to be settling her divorce in a permanent way. This is a really nicely done issue which lets us get inside Rita's head and heart and shows that Giffen can do more than laugh out loud funny.
• JSA ALL-STARS #9 - as Cyclone calls King Chimera on whether or not he's going to make a move, the rest of the All-Stars meet up with their old friend Brainwave who's obviously on exposition duty this month. And just in time, too, as the kids he's been looking after turn out to be Paradorian gods! Damn, I love this book!
• Co-feature LIBERTY BELLE & HOURMAN - you know, I could see Icicle, maybe even Tigress, reforming after this storyline. They work well together with the two JSA-ers and it'd be something of a shame to have them return to villains of the month once this story wraps up.
• MAGOG #12 - so that wraps up this series, then, although there's the forthcoming special that'll tie-up the actual storyline. An enjoyable series on the whole, mostly down to Giffen's writing again, but not, I think, one that actually had any lasting impact. Sure, Magog gets a name-check in Brightest Day this week as someone that Max Lord has to stop, but I think it likely he'll either fade away or become a JSA anti-hero/pseudo-villain as Black Adam did.
• SECRET SIX #24 - how often to you get to enjoy an issue without knowing what the hell's going on!? The Six are in some alternate dimension/universe/dream state and it looks like Junior's behind it all. The banter between Jeanette and Deadshot was wonderful and the Punch and Judy dolls looking like Joker and Harley Quinn was just genius! Can't wait to see where this goes.
• THE STAND: HARDCASES #3 - oh Harold Lauder, you sad, pathetic man.

And what made me laugh out loud:

The. Worst. Costume. Ever!

People moaned about Wonder Woman's new look that was unveiled a couple of weeks ago, but seriously, this has to be the most ill-conceived design for a costume I've ever seen. Two bandoliers criss-crossing her chest?! It's like something a 13 year-old boy would come up with - bullets and boobs!